Q: My boyfriend is uncircumcised. Are there any special techniques or considerations that I should keep in mind when we’re having sex?

No, you do not need any special techniques for an uncircumcised penis. In terms of hygiene, you may want to check that the skin folds of the foreskin is clean and, if he is not so experienced, make sure you take some care when pulling his foreskin backwards to optimise erection and sensation.

Q: Is sex important to a married couple? If the wife is unsatisfied with the performance of her husband, what should the husband do?

Yes, sex is very important in a marriage and it is a very intimate form of communication for the couple. If a spouse if not satisfied, it is very important to share openly and identify the reason(s). In most instances, dissatisfaction is usually not due to one party but is pretty much the result of both parties directly or indirectly. It is also easy for one party to find excuses for his or her dissatisfaction and, in the process, neglect his or her own performance. Sometimes, discussion or talks between the couples may not happen smoothly or may not be initiated at all. It is important in this instance to explore relationship counselling with health professionals. Most sexual issues between couples can be reversible if the cause is identified. The process of identifying and understanding the cause can be a long and complex one, so patience is key.

Q: Is it possible to have too many ejaculations? Can a man ever run out of sperm?

There have been observations that some men can have multiple orgasms and have the capacity to ejaculate a few times in a short time. However, most men have one orgasm and one ejaculation. A normal and fit man makes about 10004 sperm every second so it is difficult to run out of sperm from the production rate. However, the ability to ejaculate sperm is limited by the physical ability of the man.

Q: Can I have sex with a urine infection, and will the man catch anything or contract it?

Having sex with a urinary tract infection may exacerbate the infection. The risk of the man contracting the urinary infection is low but may occur if his immune system is very low. You should take a rest and have sex only when your urinary tract infection is resolved. This will also give you a better quality ot sex.

Q: I have often heard that men reach their sexual peak at 18 while women reach theirs at 35. Is this true? At what age can a male impregnate a female and can he ever be young or too old?

It really depends on how you define sexual peak. I think it is a very subjective issue depending on the sexual experience of the person and also ability of the person to feel his or her own primal instincts and emotions. Biologically speaking, a boy in his puberty should have organs and gametes mature enough to impregnate a female.

Q: I have been with my boyfriend for four months now and I trust him completely, but there is one thing that he has told me that has bugged me ever since, which is that he can’t wear a condom because it makes him go soft. I’ve never heard of this before and he told me about this the first time we were about to have sex. He then told me that if I didn’t believe him, we didn’t have to go through with it. We use other forms of protection when we have sex, but I’m just curious?

You should ask your boyfriend to by a looser condom and he should get better sensation it getting a good erection is really the issue. I am a little worried when you mention ‘other forms of protection’. Please take note that having contraception methods such as pills cannot eliminate you from the risk of sexually transmitted disease. Make sure you have protection for both unplanned pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases.

Q: My wife always urges me to be faster whenever we are having sex as her vagina always aches. What should I do?

This is bad. I’d rather you not have sex than be rushed. However, there must be a reason for your wife’s complaint. There could be many possibilities including a short vagina, lack of vaginal discharge, incorrect penis positioning, poor atmosphere and anxiety. It is important for both parties to enjoy sex and it is important for her to know that too. I suggest that you and your wife have a thorough check up with a doctor to find out the actual reason which may lie with you or your wife. Sexual bonding and mutually satisfying intimacy is an important part of marriage.

Q: What kind of positions will make men reach orgasm faster and more easily?

This is very subjective as attaining orgasm is not just a mechanical process. It is also a mental, biological and emotional process, so it is important for one to feel the right balance of fantasy/imagination with physical sensorial stimulation to trigger an orgasm. Some men may be more excited over a missionary position or some may be more excited over the doggy-style. However, in general, visual stimulation is one of the most important elements in the trigger process so the solution may not lie in the actual position but what is actually seen.

Q: My uncle told me that the way he stayed young is by conserving his semen. How true is it that a man will lose and get older every time he ejaculates?

The ejaculation process will not only consume energy, but emotions and bodily fluids as well. However, our body is made to rejuvenate itself with enough rest. In other words, there are also many other processes, such as exercise, which will consume energy and bodily fluids too. If we overdo it without giving the body enough rest, the body will feel tired. However, ejaculation also has many positive effects, like helping as a part of stress relief and the process of procreation. Basically, it is important that you give your body enough rest between ejaculations, and then you will feel more of the positive effects than the negative ones.

Q: I am 36 years and have never had sex. Should I start having pap smears? How often do I need to have them once I’ve started?

It is true that you will have a lower risk of getting cervical cancer if you do not have sex but it is good to have a pap smear as a baseline. Your local doctor may ask you to have one pap smear per year until you have three normal ones. You are likely to have normal pap smears unless you are sexually active.